Have you ever been told you’re too sensitive, too emotional, or that you overreact? Maybe it was in the heat of a disagreement, or maybe it was said in passing – but it stuck with you. It’s something I hear often in the therapy room: people carrying shame for simply feeling deeply.
Let’s clear something up from the start: you are not too emotional. You are human.
Where Does This Belief Come From?
From a young age, many of us are taught which emotions are “acceptable” and which ones are “too much.” We learn to suppress anger, mask sadness, or laugh off discomfort. Messages like “boys don’t cry” or “stop being dramatic” can follow us into adulthood, shaping the way we view and handle our emotions.
Over time, we may learn to doubt our feelings. We second-guess whether we’re allowed to feel what we feel. We apologise for crying. We downplay our own pain.
Sound familiar?
This emotional invalidation – whether from parents, partners, teachers, or even ourselves – can make us feel like we’re broken or overreacting. But emotional sensitivity is not a flaw. It’s a form of awareness.
What Are Emotions, Really?
Emotions are not weaknesses. They are signals. Just like physical pain tells us we’ve been hurt, emotions tell us something important is happening inside.
- Sadness may signal loss, disappointment, or a need for support.
- Anger might be protecting a boundary or highlighting injustice.
- Fear alerts us to potential danger or risk.
- Joy reminds us of what matters and brings meaning to our lives.
None of these are good or bad. They just are – and they deserve to be heard.
In therapy, I often use the analogy of emotions as messengers at the door. If we slam the door in their face, they don’t go away – they just knock louder, or come back disguised as anxiety, burnout, or physical symptoms.
The Cost of Suppressing Your Emotions
When we suppress our emotions, it can lead to:
- Chronic stress or anxiety
- Emotional numbness or disconnection from others
- Low self-esteem and self-doubt
- Difficulties in relationships
- Physical health issues (because emotions and the body are deeply connected)
It’s exhausting to constantly push things down. Eventually, those unprocessed emotions will find a way out – sometimes explosively or through ongoing tension and discomfort.
Reframing Emotional Sensitivity
Emotional sensitivity is not something to be ashamed of. In fact, it can be a strength:
- You might be highly empathetic, picking up on other people’s feelings and needs.
- You might have a rich inner world, full of creativity and insight.
- You may be deeply intuitive, with a strong sense of what feels right or wrong.
- You probably care a lot, which means your relationships matter deeply to you.
The world needs more people who feel – really feel – and who allow space for others to do the same.
So, How Can We Get Better at Feeling?
Here are a few gentle steps to start honouring your emotions instead of pushing them away:
1. Name It to Tame It
Research shows that simply naming an emotion reduces its intensity. Next time you’re overwhelmed, pause and ask yourself: What am I feeling right now? Try to be specific: is it sadness, disappointment, frustration, shame?
2. Validate Your Experience
You don’t need to justify why you feel the way you do. Instead of saying “I shouldn’t feel like this,” try: “It makes sense that I feel this way, given what I’ve been through.”
3. Avoid Emotional Judgement
There’s no such thing as a “bad” emotion. They all serve a purpose. Try to shift from judging your emotions to listening to them. What might this emotion be trying to tell you?
4. Find Safe Spaces to Express
This might be journaling, talking to a trusted friend, or working with a therapist. Emotions don’t always need solving – they need witnessing.
5. Reconnect With Your Body
Emotions live in the body. Practices like deep breathing, movement, yoga, or even a mindful walk can help you feel and release stuck emotions gently and safely.
In the Therapy Room: A Safe Place for Feeling
One of the most powerful parts of therapy is that it’s a space where all emotions are welcome. You can cry, be angry, sit in silence, or share something you’ve never said out loud. There’s no need to shrink, apologise, or explain away your experience.
So if you’ve been carrying the belief that you’re too emotional, I want you to know this:
🔹 You’re not too much.
🔹 You’re not broken.
🔹 You’re not weak.
You’re human – and that means having emotions is not just natural… it’s vital.
Final Thoughts
We live in a culture that often praises logic over emotion, independence over vulnerability, and control over expression. But emotional expression is not the opposite of strength – it is strength.
When you learn to understand your emotions instead of fearing or hiding them, you reconnect with your authentic self – and that’s where real healing begins.
If you’re ready to explore your emotions in a safe, supportive space, I’m here to help. Therapy can be the beginning of a kinder, more accepting relationship with yourself.
Bridget
Bridget Jenkins Counselling 